Saturday 27 April 2013

Seeing through Smog.




Oh God not another self indulgent woe is me bloody blog about the D-word! 

Well yes and hopefully no. It is of course about me my thoughts ideas influences and of the things that I am. A person that like many others suffers mood swings. I know that many will suffer more and others less. I know some will care deeply and others care less. I just felt that 4 years after intending to start a blog I ought to settle down and do something about it so here goes.

So why Pea-Souper? 
Well I read a lot of the on-line "self help/save me I'm lost" type web sites looking for solutions to my "Problem"many of them ask about how you describe your lowest mood.A popular one being the "black dog" first referenced by Winston Churchill when describing his own mood swings.

I never feel like my feelings are divorced from me and existing in another being like that, I see mine as a struggle to see to see a way through to see answers solutions or conclusions. I gather that's a very male thing,solving it sorting it working it out. When I can't see it I imagine it  feels like I am losing sight my view blocked by a smog the deeper the low the thicker the smog. At my lowest  "A Real  Pea-Souper". This is how Londoner's used to refer to the dense clouded cover that would fall upon cities like theirs in 1950's a fog so thick you could almost imagine cutting holes in it with a knife. Of course as mood improves I feel the fog thinning and lifting. When it's gone I'm on song pumped, keen ready for action rejuvenated reborn fan-bloody-tastic! 

Oh dear; calm down son!

So I intend to write thoughts, ideas, poems, bit's of prose, the odd image probably. We shall see. I will be linking to sites that have information advice or just fun stuff about mental health in its broadest possible meaning. I have been an on-line advocate for several sites and my twitter will show a large number of M.H. charities organisations and support groups as well as my interest in Autism ( inspired by a phenomenal blog I found). Dogs (I am a volunteer puppy socialiser for Hearing Dogs UK).

There will be an underlying theme of mood and it may well drive the bulk of content. My personal hope is that it will prove cathartic and that it will help me connect with people. Something that my condition is preventing me from doing as I would wish. If others get something from it that will be a bonus and my G.P will be pleased as he has been suggesting I write for a very long time! 

For the first posting I will add a piece of poetry (I use the word loosely I know) and an image I borrowed from the internet and a borrowed quote attached to it.

I tweet occasionally and you can follow me by clicking on the link below, I will tweet each new entry. 

If you've read this then thank you. I hope it was okay if so add me on twitter or link to the site, and thanks again.




©Agides